The video begins. Stock footage of people in headsets fades in and out. Someone uses the phrase "customer success journey" without blushing.
Most of the audio is corrupted, but you catch phrases like "critical uptime", "proactive posture", and "it is probably DNS".
By the time the video ends, you have learnt nothing practical, but you do feel a vague sense of being on call.
The heavy door clunks open. Beyond it, a windowless room glows with dashboard light and the quiet panic of other people’s problems.